An ever-changing role

Has being a mother changed me as a person?

You bet it has! I may not be the same person I was a long time ago and pre-kids, but I’m much richer for the person I have become and keep changing into. It’s taken a lot to get to this point. I’ve lost a lot personally (some I’m really glad I did, especially looking back now) and I’ve also gained some more positive influences in my life along the way as well, you all know who you are! I’m not sorry if you don’t like me now, that’s your choice. And if you do like me, good luck to you, haha! I know I have two little ladies or pains-in-the-butt (depending on the day) that think I’m the best person in their world…most of the time…and that’s all that really matters at the end of the day.

We spend so much time trying to live up to this idea of the “perfect mother”. Who and where the hell is she? She doesn’t exist. No, really she doesn’t and I’m happy to argue that point with anyone who’s keen. I’ll admit I’m just as bad as everyone else out there, thinking that I need to be the most perfect mother. To say the right things and make sure my children have everything under the sun, just because. Why? It doesn’t mean they’ll turn out any differently or be any better than any other kid out there. To me, that is probably more about how we interact behind closed doors. I scream, yell and swear when my kids are driving me crazy (who doesn’t??) but I also have a softer side too.

I’m forever telling my girls how much I love them, how beautiful they are, giving them big cuddles and kisses because I want them to know, not only how important they are to me, but also how much they should value themselves and their place in the world. Yeah I know, I should really take some of my own advice, but that never works! When you have kids, you make a bucket load of promises about how different their lives will be and that you won’t have the biggest brats in the world. They certainly have their moments, haha!

I’m constantly worried that I’m screwing their lives up majorly and doing the wrong thing all the time, that I’m the worst mother in the world. My girls reassure me I’m the best mummy ever and it melts my heart. Maybe I’m doing something a little bit right after all. But who can tell? There is no rule book. How I do things for my girls may not work for other mums out there and there is nothing wrong with that. You can parent how you want to and I’m certainly going to keep doing things my way. Whether it works all the time, well, that’s another story. Just when I think I’ve got some kind of handle on things; my girls throw another spanner in the works and I’m back to square one. It certainly keeps life interesting.

Until next time…you’ll find me enjoying plenty of kisses and cuddles with my little munchkins, I know they won’t last forever!

Up, down and all around

It’s fair to say I’ve encountered a lot in my short time so far as a parent.

I’ve been spewed on, pooed on, weed on and dribbled on.

I’ve been scratched, bitten, pinched, poked, sat on and squashed and had my hair pulled numerous times.

You name it, it’s pretty much happened, well still is happening.
I guess you kind of get used to it all…..eventually!

And with every day producing all kinds of excitement and mayhem, I’ve started to realise and take note of some of the things I say.

Oh the things you’ll hear coming out of your own mouth you never thought possible….that is until you have children.

You can pretty much hear your own parents over your shoulder as the words come tumbling out.

I used to laugh when I overheard other parents telling their kids not to say or do ridiculous things.
Now I think I’m the one being laughed at.

It’s no surprise really considering at times I probably sound pretty silly.

The words can be normal, odd and sometimes extremely random, just like children.

So here goes:

•Don’t pick your nose.
•Don’t touch your poo.
•Don’t drink the bath water.
•That doesn’t go up your nose.
•Don’t lick the shower glass.
•Stop kicking in the bath like you are in a swimming pool.
•Slow down or you will trip over your own feet.
•What have you got in your mouth? That is not food!
•We don’t eat crayons, we draw with them.
•Don’t pat your sister’s head, she is not a dog!
•Don’t squash your sister, you know she will get you back one day.
•Don’t eat your clothes.
•Don’t eat your hair.
•I have no idea what you’re saying, it sounds like another language.
•You have to pay attention and look where you are going, you don’t have eyes in the back of your head.
•Are you even listening to me? Or am I speaking to myself?
•Your bed/the lounge is not a trampoline, don’t jump on it!
•How about you try eating your dinner (or food in general) rather than painting with it?
•Don’t wipe your hands on your clothes, unless you want to do the washing?!
•Why are you putting toys in the bin? (Probably has a lot to do with us threatening to do it, haha!)
•What did I just step in?! (Is it water or wee?)
•Don’t give me a reason to smack you.
•I’m the parent, you are my child, which makes me the boss whether you like it or not.
•Leave that straw in your drink, don’t use it as a toy!
•Don’t make me come in there.
•I’m not even going to ask how you got food up your nose.
•If you don’t start behaving I’m cancelling your birthday! (It was at this moment my husband and I agreed that we sounded like our own parents!)
•You have to brush your teeth or they might fall out.
•If I have to tell you one more time…
•Oh well we can’t go out now because you haven’t eaten your breakfast.
•An oldie but a goodie….I’ve told you once, I’ve told you a thousand times…

This is just the PG version, I’m sure you can imagine some others! The list could go on and I’ve likely forgotten many but I’m sure there will be plenty more ahead of us.

But I must admit, although at times what I (we) say sounds funny, it’s never quite as hilarious when your toddler throws it back at you!
As always, that’s another story…..

Shame on words

I’m not backward in coming forward.

Those of you who know me well would be used to hearing what I have to say.

So I couldn’t stay quiet about something which I feel needs to be said.

So here goes….

Stop the mum shaming! Enough is enough.

To all the mums out there, you rock!

You’re doing an amazing job, even if you feel like you aren’t.

You might be doing everything right and you could be getting it all wrong.

But who cares as long as you and your kids are happy! Right?!

Apparently not!

Mum shaming is out there and it’s a case of judge or be judged.

No one says you have to like what other mums do.

Why on earth do we all feel the need to bring each other down?!

You know what?? Some mums work. Some don’t and some even work from home, fancy that!

Some mums breastfeed and others don’t or even can’t so there’s nothing wrong with a bottle!

You can purée food for your little one or make use of handy pouches or packets, as long as your child is fed it’s up to you how you do it!

There are mums who co-sleep and yep you guessed it, mums who don’t.

You might choose to yell at and smack your kids or you might not.

Some mums actually choose to stay at home and others have to go to work because they don’t have a choice, that doesn’t make either role any less tiring than the other.

Some mums use daycare and others don’t.

Parenting is full of ups and downs and twists and turns. It doesn’t need to be a competition.

No one is perfect and there isn’t one set way to parent.

Yet in this crazy world we live in, it seems people feel the need to bring other parents down and tell them they pretty much suck.

Everyone is entitled to an opinion, hell I’ve certainly got my fair share.
But there are times when it’s just better to keep that opinion to yourself.

So what if you don’t agree with what another mum does or doesn’t do for their child, it’s not your place to say otherwise.

If you do feel the need to open your mouth, shove a piece of chocolate into it instead, it’ll leave a better taste….